I will keep my mouth shut from now onwards!

Glad that i have this little corner of mine to let me vent out my frustration, upset-ness, angry-ness as well as share my happiness.

Today, i got no clue what trigger the fire between me and my boss. All started with, i drop him an email telling him i will be working from another office. All these while, he is ok if we were to work from another office. But today...i receive an sarcastic email from him saying that if i am having intention to move to new job, then we do not need to talk about this. HUH? What? Talk what??

So i get piss off and replied his email saying that as of now, i have NO intention to move on to any new job, BUT, if he wants me to move out from his team, then i am OK! And instead of confronting me, he spoke to another manager of him and that manager become our messenger and break the ice and put off the fire between me and my boss. So i called my boss per his request, and he apologies to me saying he gets frustrated over on other issue, and not on me, and he doesn't mean to send out that email....Well, what can i do. I just say "ok". For those who know mandarin, 覆水难收 (spilled water can't be collected back), and whatever that said out which hurt people, no matter how many sorryssssssssss you said, it's still there. I told myself no point cried over spilled milk. ok...life move on...

In the afternoon, got an email from boss asking all of us to do some update. And the busy body me told him that actually we have one file in our shared folder. And for don't know what reason, he want to grumble on me to another person, he typed the message in my IM screen. The message doesn't seems to me, it sounds like he is typing to someone and saying that i always give negative feedback when he ask us to do something. Oh well well..lesson learn in hard way, NEVER and EVER be BUSY BODY. But, to be professional, i act as if i don't see the message and act dumb and offer help to consolidate the data for him.

And at this moment, when i get time to sit down and think over what happened on me today, i feel it's time for me to move on. Since he sees the messages from me at negative way, no point for me to keep working with him, the trust is not there anymore. I recalled back...i offer my help to consolidate data for him few times, and this is what i get in return. This is what he think about me. Why can't he put thing at positive way. When i told him we have data in shared point, why can't he just ask me whether are those data up to date? Why he needs to think that i refuse to do for him? Sometimes when he ask us to do some update, i will ask for a standard format, so that all of us in sync, so probably i am too busy body and he thought i reluctant to do and ask for excuses. I can't understand him. Maybe this is our communication gap or we are not meant to work together.

And from today onwards, i will keep QUIET and do whatever thing he wants WITHOUT asking for more info. I feel upset, down, frustrated, helpless, hopeless......but glad that i have 2 sweetheart at home to cheer me up. Both of them are in their lala-land. Gosh, today is mid-autumn festival and it's raining heavily out there, see, GOD also cry for me. Thank you GOD, at least u hear me!

My recent online purchase

An ex-colleague of mine introduced this site to me, and recently i bought 3 items from iPerfect Fashion, love them so much. I also do my online clothes shopping with Ocean Boutique, and this site also being introduced by a friend of mine. Love those items that i purchase from this site too.

I will HIGHLY RECOMMEND these 2 sites to all my fellow friends. Both sites has good customer service.

Happy 6th Anniversary

Time flies.....has been dating with him for almost 12 yrs and legally married for 6 yrs!!

Happy 6th Anniversary to me and my dearest Bb!!

A bad lunch at Waka City Bayview

I attended training at town area and decided to go to Waka in City Bayview hotel for lunch. Previosuly, Waka is at Rasa Sayang hotel, however, the hotel was closed for upgrade, as such, Waka moved to City Bayview hotel. Ever since the moved, hubb told me the food quality is no longer there, but i would like to try it myself before i can conclude anything.

It has been a while i wanted to go to Waka for lunch, but somehow, never make it..until last month when i attended training at town area, we went there for lunch. First time step into the restaurant, was kinda vacant, never mind...so we sat down and order our food. Food quite nice, and when we made payment, the lady told us about their promotional set lunch instead of normal set lunch. What a dang..the waitress NEVER tell us about the promotion set lunch which as ramen as one of the choice. So we decided to give Waka another visit when we had our training this week.

Second visit, reached the restaurant around 12 noon, when the waitress served us, again, she didn't mention about the promotional set lunch until we asked. So we ordered 2 sets of tepanyaki beef and one spicy ramen. Waiting waiting waiting...has been more than 30 mins, then only i see the so called chef walk out from the kitchen, start to do our tepanyaki. I am not sure that guy is the chef or part time chef.....

So wait wait and wait..finally we see waitress walk out from kitchen with one claypot. And guess what, she served the other table which come later than us. One of my friend was pissed off and call the waitress, and the waitress pretend not hearing her and my friend need to raise her voice then only the waitress come to our table. My friend asked why the lady being served before us, and the waitress told us that they call in advance to do their booking. And the waitress didn't even apologies with my friend for not responding to her call. Well, yes..the other lady call to book in advance, but we waited for so long, so even though the 2 ramens being brought out from kitchen with less than 1 minute apart, to me, i feel they should serve us before the other lady. When we waited for our food, we hardly see ANY waitress in the restaurant, don't know where they hide themselves, and i even need to request for green tea refill. *thought this should be done automatically right?*

ok, here come our beef. First bite, COLD, second bite..it's as hard as WOOD. Eat the rice, it's as hard as uncooked rice. So continue to eat until i can't stand anymore, my gum was so pain, the beef is so hard. And for the first time, i decided not to finish my food. I am not very fussy when come to food, those who know me, can tell from my size, right? LOL! But this time, i really dissapointed with the beef, so i only forced myself to eat half of it.

We are late for the training, so quickly proceed to pay money, but again, waited and yelled, no one actually want to come to us. Fire on....at first i just want to let go...but while waiting, i think think and think..feel not willing to pay for the beef in full price. After about 3 minutes, i can see a human walking towards us and NO APOLOGIES for bad service. And the lady that attended to us is the lady that we want to complain!That lady is the one who ignore my friend. Duh!! And again, that lady seems has deaf ears and i was so mad and started to complain about the food.

M: Me; W: Waitress; F: Friend
F: Why when i called you just now and you ignore me, i called u so many times.
W: *the waitress again pretend not hearing my friend*
M: The beef is very hard, as hard as wood. This is the worst beef that i ever had, i call it WOOD instead of beef. And i don't think i should be charged the full price.
W: Oh...the beef still there?
M: i didn't finish mine, but she * i pointing to my other friend* finished hers.
W: Why didn't you guys inform us after we served the food?
M: huh? inform you and wait for another 30 mins ??
W: sorry, we have some problem with our kitchen crew.
M: well, don't tell me your problem. You should at least maintain the Waka Standard.
F: I see this Ms Phang from D*** ordering quite a number pax of food from Waka, do you want us to call this Ms Phang and tell her our bad experience?
W: What about if i give u 20% discount
M: Nope, i think i deserve more than 20%
W: So what do you think?
M: 50%
W: *paused for a while, must be cursing for my barbarian-ness* What about i don't charge your portion and i only charge your friends meal.
F: I only complain with the service , not on the food.
M: well, it's up to you. Net net, i feel disappointed with this so call Waka standard. Firstly, the beef is cold, secondly the beef is hard.

So at the end, we being charged 1 free tepanyaki beef, 80% for the other set beef tepanyaki and full price for the spicy ramen. I don't mean to ask for free meal but with that type of service attitude, i don't think it's worth of money. I don't think i will never go back to Waka for food again! Had super bad experience and the wooden beef make my gum so painful.

Maybank oh Maybank!

I thought i am the only person who is so bad luck where my ATM card is faulty. But today when i went to Maybank in QBM, realized that i am not alone! Lots of Maybank ATM card holder face the same problem aka, the ATM card can't get processed by Maybank ATM machine!! However, i get a better treatment as compare to them.

I had problem with my ATM card for almost 3 mths, ** so long until i lost track**. First time, i wasn't able to withdraw money from Tesco ATM machine, so thought it's the problem with the machine. And before i make the conclusion, i slot my card into other bank's ATM machine to confirm my card isn't faulty, and yes...i am right, other ATM machine able to recognise my card and allow me to do the transaction. So wait wait wait...following week, try my luck at the same ATM machine in Tesco, also cannot. Then noticed that the person in front and behind me also unable to do any trasaction as well. So i make a conclusion ~ that ATM machine has problem and not yet fixed. Went to QBM's Maybank ATM machine, able to withdraw money. Then happy go shopping!

Next mth, again, die hard customer, went back to the same ATM machine in Tesco, SAME, cannot do any transaction. Went to QBM's Maybank ATM machine, also NOT able to withdraw money. A bit on fire. So went to QBM Maybank customer service to check, the lady very unfriendly and super unhelpful. She just use eraser to clean the chip on the ATM card and kept telling me there isn't anything wrong with my card. Hello, i also can tell that there isn't anything wrong with my card as my card is in super good shape and condition. And she told me, if i would like to have my card replace, i need to pay RM12..WHAT????? And if i go back to the bank where i have my open my account, i may get to waive for the charges. Since i open my account at the Bukit Jambul branch, so i went to the Maybak at i-Avenue. The front desk lady also tell me the same story, "nothing wrong with my card" and she asked me to try with their machine. To my surprise, i am able to withdraw money. So i checked with her, and according to her, nowadays Maybank is engaging third party to maintain all their ATM machines and not all ATM machines being well calibrated. Ok...fine..accept the explanation. And that lady doesn't want to replace my ATM card for me.

3rd mth, went to QBM Maybank ATM machine to withdraw money. WHAT??? Still unable! So fire burning and it's already after their wrking hour but since i see there's people in the bank, so i walked in and talked to one of a male officer. And ahem...with this, i apply some of my soft and barbarian skill, i told him my card doesn't allow my to withdraw money and tell him my story bla bla...this nice malay guy, he listened to me and help me to troubleshoot, and i pretend innocent and below is our conversation,
M: Me; O : Officer

M:My card can't be processed by the ATM machine.
O: Oh..what error message do you see?
M: It says something like "ask me to check with the bank"
O: oh....
M: Actually i have this problem for almost 3 mths...** then i bla bla bla with my story**
O: oh, ok ok, let me check your card for you *8so, tik tok tik tok, he punched in the card detail and do some checking for me" Hmm...there isn't any block at your card, everything seems fine.
M: but i can't withdraw money, if i want to replace my ATM card, do i need to pay?
O: yes, you need to pay RM12
M: huh? RM12...but u see, my card is in good shape and condition, nothing wrong...it's the Maybank ATM machine has problem**take opportunity to hentam **
O: But now everyone go home already, you come tomorrow and i replace for you
M: Then do i need to pay or not?
O: Nope, no need, i can do it for you FOC, but tomorrow i am not working
M: Eerrrm...then how?
O: Never mind, you wait for a while, i ask my colleague to settle it for you
M: ok ok, thanks, so FOC right?
O: Yes, will do it FOC for you.

yeah..happily walked to Sub Way and order "today's special" for myself and walked to Old Town Kopitiam to meet with hubb.

Voila...so simple, and i save RM12. Not that i don't have RM12, but i don't feel worth paying it. And today when i went there to get my card replace, i see at least 5 people coming in with sour face, saying their ATM card cannot get processed. And the customer service rep just tell them, "you need to replace your ATM card and pay RM12" and those people just agree to pay without any question. If you are Maybank ATM card holder and if your card not working (provided your card is in good shape) PLEASE DO NOT PAY for the card replacement charges. Stand on your own feet , be firm and insist them to replace it for you FOC! Apply some soft barbarian skill, ok! LOL!

And another lesson learn is, go to see a male officer rather than lady officer. They are more friendly, LOL!

My biggest fear for now...

Guess what...i'm being attacked by chicken pox virus on last Wed, which is also 4th day of CNY, what a day! Well, this wasn't that bad yet...the fear that i am having is, after i got to know that i had chicken pox and at the same time found out that my small little one, 16 mths old daughter yet to get her chicken pox vaccination, what a big DANG for me. So quickly, on last Thursday i send her for chicken pox vaccination, i know it's too late, but what else can i do? That's the only thing that i can do for her, and hoping she will not get the virus from me.

I tried to avoid contact with the 2 kids so much, but, the more u avoid, the more they will come to you. For both kids though. I really feel bad that i need to turn them down when they want to hug me or sometimes they just want to touch me, but i afraid that may broke the blister, so i wont let them touch me either. At night, usually i will let Kaitlyn sleep on my hand, she likes to request me to put my hand on the bed and she sleeps on it. But for these few days, i can't do so, i need to cover myself with the blanket like rice dumpling, then she will sleep on the blanket on top of me. Thank GOD, she is such an understanding girl, she doesn't make lots of fuss when she can't sleep on the same bed with me..however, middle of the night, she will move herself and sleep next to me. **slapped forehead**

As for Kelvin, since he can understand me better than his sister, so i told him i am having "bacteria" on my whole body, so he can't come near me, LOL! And he does whine at night, want me to sleep with him, but after i remind him about the "bacteria" story, he will go to his lala-land happily by himself.

I hope none of the kids will get infected by this chicken pox virus!!!!

Soooo dissappointed with Jaya Jusco service

There was a sales at Jaya Jusco on last Saturday, 7th Nov and since we need to stock up diaper for Kaitlyn, so we went to Jusco after breakfast. We reached Jusco around 1130am, and straight i proceed to look for Mamy Poko L size. Look high and low, left and right, up and down, can't find any jumbo pack L size Mamy Poko. Get fed up already as this is not FIRST TIME i encouter such problem with Jaya Jusco. I will say 7 out of 10 times when they advertise there is sales of Mamy Poko, i will have hard time getting the size that i want.

It's only around 1130am, and the queue is already very long. So, i asked hubb to queue at the check out counter as the queue is very very long, and i went to Information counter to check with them what type of promotion they are having when i don't see any jumbo Mamy Poko being displayed on the shelf. The reception at information counter told me " I don't know, this is not my counter, you need to ask Mamy Poko promoter" I get even more angry and i told him i don't care whether he know what is happening or not, i want to talk with the manager on duty, then only he told me he will get the Mamy Poko promoter to come to information counter to talk to me. Waited for a while, no one come and i told him i am not going to stand there and wait, i don't have much time to fool around with them. And he even asked me to sit and wait...DUH!

After a while, here come the Mamy Poko promoter, she walk with window shopping style , look here and there, and come to approach me. When i told her i am looking for Mamy Poko L and XL size, she told me NO STOCK!!! WHAT??????? and she said only has size smaller than L and ask me whether i want it or not. (use brain ok...if my kids can wear M size, then what for i jump up and down to look for L size?) And i asked her whether will she restock the diapers later today? And she said " I tak tahu!" WHAT????????? Angry already la and i scolded her and tell her " if this is the case, you better don't advertise in newspaper saying u have sales of all range of Mamy Poko diapers", and i told her i really feel cheated by the advertisement , furthermore this is not the first time i can't find the diapers that i want on sales day. I really get very dissapointed with Jusco's service, and i really never expect such a customer experience from Jusco.

I remember once, Tesco having crazy sales on diapers and the size of diapers that i want is out of stock, the information counter lady is so nice that she take the trouble to check for me when the new stock will arrive.

So, i rather pay more and no more shopping at Jaya Jusco, unless i have no choice!

Let's have fun!

Today is my 3rd day at my new world and apprently today is our department's team building day. We are going for lunch. And all of us thought that we need to go back to office continue to work after the lunch, however, our boss said NOPE NOPE NOPE!

According to him, in US, as long as it's team building day, the team observe half day off. So what we gonna do after lunch??

Hiking
Movie
Bowling

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And the final decision is Bowling. **what a relief for me** I so scared when someone suggested hiking. I am not gonna hike under hot sun, later i will come back like little red indian.

In another 25 mins time, we will call the day off and head to Golden Triangle at Juru Auto City for lunch. After that, we will be going to Megamall for bowling. Has been LONG time i didn't bowl, am sure i will wash the bowling drain clean and clear. And also hopefully my hand wont be cacat-ed by tomorrow.

Let's have fun!!

A whole new world

Today, remarks new journey for me, is a brand new day for me... a whole new world.

Wish me luck ! haha!

As of now, i am surfing net, chatting with friends, shaking my legs. Well, this is what a person will do or enjoy before they get busy , busy and busy! Don't envy me!

Bye Bye bitter life

It's my last day in J. I don't have mixed feeling, the only feeling that i have is HAPPY!!!! Happy!!! and Happy!!!

And i can't really wait to leave office by 12 noon. In case you wonder why 12 noon and not 5pm, let me tell you.

My dear boss want us to work on Sunday for half day, and to compensate the half day of Sunday, we get second half off on Friday. But u think can have epace mind on Friday second half when the rest of the world still working? Of course no way, still need to entertain phone call or email from work...duh! Tipu orang punya half day off!

ok, back to my story

Boss called me and asked me to return the laptop to her before i leave office and at the same time, she asked me to return the calculator!! WHAT?? Calculator???? She said calculator is one of the starter kit that company give to us!! WHAT??? I must be loosing my memory. I don't recall HR gave me any calculator as starter kit. And i told her, No calculator given to me when i join. Then u know what, she said some people they just go buy a RM10 calculator and give back to the company. WTF!! Company NEVER give me one, and now want me to buy one give back?? I already pay the company RM10k+ for short notice penalty, and now still want to get RM10 from me...duh!!! And since my senior, she left her calculator to me when she leave the company, so together with the laptop i gave back to OV.

When she sees the calculator, she's so happy..she happily said to me
"just now you said no calculator, and how come now got calculator"

I told her,
" This calculator is given by Cindy to me when she left the company"

She happily said,
"See, i told you, the company gave u guys calculator in the starter kit"

I was like, WHAT??? my english is too bad or what...i said "Cindy" gave to me..not Company!!! Duh. You know what, this OV, she doesn't allow us to purchase stationary from company. She said "go grab from hotel when u stay in hotel, no need to buy one!" WAH LAU EH! And each of our desk, there's one white board beside us, for the whiteboard marker also SENDIRI BELI! So when i leave, of course i bring along my whiteboard markers la, throw away also happier than give to her! All my pens, papers, bla bla, i bring home too! Leaving behind nothing to her!

Anyhow, glad that i am leaving!!! And going to start my new journey in life!

Coutdown to the day

I am counting down to the DAY....
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I am requesting to leave my existing company with short notice. With this, i need to pay the short notice penalty. I will need to pay for around 1.5 mths salary. Still pending for our C&B officer to let me know the amount.

During this time period, "she" still bug me a lot! And last Wednesday, customer escalated as my replacement didn't respond to their email. "She" called me up and scolded me WHY i didn't ask my replacement to reply customer's email. I was like , "WHAT???" Why do i need to remind my replacement to reply email? I thought he suppose to know what he's suppose to do! I was so mad and i slam the phone! So piss off...

Never mind, another week to go!

Flash back on the "day"

Monday (7th Sep 2009), "she" asked me to see her. Guess what is the topic for the discussion?

S: "she" ; M : Me

S: your replacement will be here today, so what you want to do. You have 2 choices,
a) You tender resignation
b) I fire you

M: **keep quiet, I wanted to tell her i will tender, but i still want to see what else she will do to me and what else she wants to say to me. so as per what i expect, she continue with her "valuable" talk**

S: You not worth the money the company paying you. You not qualify to hold the current position that you are holding.

M: **deep in my heart, i am laughing** why? Because she is the one who interviewed me, she is the one who hire me!! So if she thinks i am not worth the money and not qualify to hold my current position, so means that she judge me wrongly when she interviewed me! LOL! Oh..what a big mistake she had done in her life!

S: During that time, because we desperate need someone to backfill the person who's leaving, that's why we are willing to pay you that much.

M: **still keep quiet** who cares u r desperate looking for people or whatsoever. bottom line is, the company willing to pay me the salary that i asked for...so if you think i am overpaid, then u should have hilight this to the HR when you want to hire me

S: you don't have such a big head, you should wear such a big hat. You are not worth the money that the company pay you.

M: **Duh** 佛都有火. (Buddha also got fire) But i still remain cool and keep showing her my silly face. Since i already decided to tender, what for i go justify and clarify and explain to her so much.

she continue fi li fa la talk non stop and i listen half don't listen half until don't sure for how long, finally she ler me go. she asked me to tell her my final decision by end of the day.

Oh yeah, before i left, she said:-
S: I want you to train up the replacement and then come to me and tell me whether he can handle the job or not.

M: **who cares! Again, u r the one who hire him, and you go and access him! I am leaving anyway, i don't even bother whether he will be able to handle the job or not, coz this is none of my business**

For the whole session, i just "ummm", "ok". and nothing much. What else u want me to say. Beg her? Cry in front of her? Or what knee down and apologies?" If i do so, i must be losing my mind !

Later i went to my desk, check on the chat archive between me and my replacement, he rold me he will be here on Tuesday (8th Sep 2009). I don't even bother to let her know that she's wrong, coz she may scold me back saying i gave her wrong info bla bla. She always has her own reason to scold me, as to her, i am stupid, i am dumb. And she is the greatest of all! So who cares!

What have i done on this auspicious day 09/09/09

Lots of people especially couple choose to get registered, married on this auspicious day, 09/09/09. SO DO I!! Me getting married? Nope, me going for giving birth? Nope, me going for my birthday celebration? Nope......then what did i do then...
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I, finally TENDER my RESIGNATION! After so long, finally i did that on this auspicious day. He said i should have done it on 09/09/09 09:09:09am! Geez, i missed the auspicious time though. Never mind, i pick the day but not the time!

With this, i hope good luck will come to me and follow me as long as i wish!

How much does happiness cost?

Can someone tell me how much do i need to pay for a day of happy at work?
I am more than willing and happy to pay for it.

Can someone tell me how to avoid get blame for things that not under my job scope?
I am more than happy to pay you if you can give me to tips or hints.

Can someone tell me how to how to get out from this messy place?
I am more than happy to pay you if you can get me out from this place.

I know, money is not everything, but without money, everything also cannot do.
That's why i am still stuck here even though i am not happy! even though my life is so miserable! even though everyday i go to work with happy face, and the moment i step into my work place, my back started to get shoot now and then!

If everyone don't have to work, how nice!
If money can buy happiness, how nice!
If i have money and power to shut these people away, HOW NICE!

my 2 kids

For don't know what reason, my 2 kids seems have very good relation with Ms Goh and uncle James. When Kaitlyn sees uncle James, she will be very excited and she will show the "come, carry me" sign.

But again, with those people who has blood relation, they don't seems bother to know their grandkids progress. Well, maybe they do get update from their son. And one thing that i am SURE is, they NEVR spend any single cent on my 2 kids!ARGH!!!

Even when strangers see my kids, some will play with them. And again, why the paternal grandparents has no feel on them. Maybe like friend said, it's better for them don't come over as me and them do not have any chemistry in between.

I need your input

Chat with a friend on my thought of resign and stay at home.
He said, as long as hubby can support the household expenses, then can consider. But, actually my case is more complicated, as the problem is myslef.

First, i cannot let go my salary;
Second, i cannot let go my income;
Third, i cannot let go my wages;
so overall conclusion is, i cannot let go my pay!

So how?

And he said it took him 2 yrs to think over his wife's proposal to be full time house wife. So does it means i need to nag hubb for another few ore yrs before he agree to let me become full time housewife? No no, i don't want to be full time housewife, i want to be full time MUMMY. Because my full time housewife = maid; as full time housewife need to wash clothes, sweep floor, mop floor, cook, iron clothes...eww ; whereas full time mummy is just send, pick up kids from school, play with them, supervise them on their homework. Am i right? LOL!

So continue to work or continue to appeal for full time mummy application??

Welcome to 'si lai' club!

Is this what i want?

Recently, i being assigned something new in my job. And things started to change, my nightmare come...

First of all, i being escalated by the customer for no reason...darn
Second, again i bring escalated by the customer for no reason...double darn...
Third, Fourth will be same too....

I really have no idea why that lady keep biting at me. Friend said, maybe she afraid of me will go complain on her, so she complain and back stab me first. Well, frankly, ever since i start to take up this new assignment, i feel very upset, unhappy, and every night i have to work til late night, midnight, and i am working now. While waiting for data loading, i sneak and update my blog. Feel so guilty as i didn't update my kids blog promptly. I will try my best to update theirs.

Usually i will be in the room with the 2 kids, tugging both of them at the same time. One hand hugging Kaitlyn and the other hand pat Kelvin. But for these few night, i need to shut my ears as Kelvin will cry so badly when he doesn't see me in the room when he wants to sleep.While i am typing this, i heard Kelvin crying in the room. But, i can't walk into the room, coz when he sees me, he will cry even louder. so i will leave to hubb to handle him.

As for Kaitlyn, mom needs to help me tug her to sleep. Every night, mom will let her sleep in cradle in her house, then send her home and make sure she's still sleeping when she reached our house so that i can continue to do my work without interruption. And u know what, i used to nurse her before she sleeps, and for these few days, because i am so tight up with my FOREVER unfinished job, so i didn't nurse her, mom bottle feed her and tug her to bed. And i noticed that, for those night that i didn't nurse her before she sleeps, when she wakes up at middle of the night, she will look around as if she is looking for something and when i go near her, she will throw me a SWEET smile middle of the night and continue to sleep. My heart sank when i see her doing so. I feel so guilty.

I am not sure what i should do next!
I am so upset at work, and i am having 2 upset kids at home. All because of me. Sometimes i am so frustrated coz i need to stay late and get my job done and i am so tired, so i will be a bit frustrated when Kelvin wants to play with me. I will just shut him off. I am such a lousy and bad mom! As for hubb, i hardly talk to him nowadays, coz i feel exhausted and tired, and i don't know how and what to tell him. I don't want to bring the unhappiness from work back home, but my face and expression betray me! I am such a lousy wife at the same time too!

PLEASE tell me, what should i do. Seriously, if my company ever offer VSS again, i will TAKE IT without any DOUBT. I am willingly to forgo my pay and what i want is happy life. I am very tired and exhausted. GOD, HELP ME if you HEAR ME!

I am here!!

Hello all....i am still alive and kicking.

Back to work on January09 from my maternity leave and temporary doing some easy job, kicking and shaking my legs for the past 2 months plus and then now being assign on a new assignment, actually is doing back the previous role as global demand planner. The only different is taking care another business unit and this business unit is more towards buy and sell, so again different as the business uni that i handle before i go for maternity leave...hello...u still there with me or already confuse by me?

ok, in summary, i am now picking up something new and quite busy. Still adjusting myself to the working world as i have been in dreamland for quite some time. So pls bear with me, i will be ow in updating my baby blog and personal blog.

Me and my new look

One fine day ~ 9 of Feb, i decided to go ahead for hair cut, so asked hubb to drop me at the hair saloon. He thought i am going for hair trim, so when he picked me up, he get shocked seeing me with short hair...yeah! I really go for a REAL hair CUT! Feel so fresh now. Economy is bad mah..so must save some hair shampoo!! yeah right!

So now, no worry that Kelvina nd Kaitlyn will pull my hairs! And no need to worry what hair pin to use to match with my clothes every morning!

My hair used to be that long......

and now, it's become like this!

It's hurt til bottom of my feet!

MIL called hubb on 27th Oct around 5:30pm (i must record down the date and time!!!)and hubb passed the phone to me. Eventhough i don't feel like talking to her but then i still force myself to talk over the phone, but guess what?!!!!

She said she thought i only take care Kaitlyn and IGNORE Kelvin til Kelvin has fever! WTF!! I don't mind if peopls criticise me saying i am not a good wife, i am not a good daughter, i am not a good daughter in law, i am not a good sister, BUT I DO MIND when it comes to people's comment on how i handle my kids! To me, they are EVERYTHING, i am willing to sacrify ANYTHING for my kids! I almost want to F her over the phone, but i do control myself, i responded to her by telling her "both also my own kids, there isn't any special preference over the newborn!" WTF! Then she said she is joking with me, WTF! It's not humor at ALL! Her word really hurt me thoroughly! I immediately lost my appetite and walked into the toiler and cry! This is the only way to release my sadness on someone who claimed joking with me. But to me, this is not a JOKE! I hesitate whether should i let hubb know or not.....and i thought i can handle the comment but at the end i choose to tell hubb on his mom's comment on me. Well, expected, he just kept quiet. Afterall, i don't expect much from him, afterall, SHE is HIS MOM!

And MIL further added saying that initially she want to come to Penang to help up! My GOSH, C'on, come to Penang to help?? Help what??!! She can't drive, can't walk in the mall all by herself, and i don't talk with her...if she comes here, what she can help up? Make me even more uncomfortable only! And i told her "NO NEED, my mom is helping me to get all the things that the confinement lady want!" Just LEAVE ME ALONE, PLEASE!

If they are really so thoughtful, pls sit down and think, WHAT HAVE THEY DONE FOR MY 2 KIDS?!!!! DAMN! I am so piss off!